I hear you’ve been feeling stuck. Stuck how?
At odds with yourself. At odds in your closest relationships. At odds with the world itself—a person would definitely feel very trapped in a tangle like that. Feeling into it from here, it seems like the stress is self-perpetuating. As if the fact that you feel trapped has made you feel even more trapped, hasn’t it?
How has this been showing up in your life? In your body? In your relationships? In your thoughts? In the very fabric of your reality?
I’m not saying we can change the very fabric of your reality. But you get to shift your experience, and that is an incredibly similar magic, if you ask me.
What would you like to experience? Not this? Of course, of course not-this. What does not-this feel like, in your body? In your relationships? In your thoughts? What will you be doing, when your experience is not-this? What does not-this smell like? Look like? Taste and sound like? The big words--freedom. And the little words--an unknotting in my chest, a deeper, fuller breath. Notice the thoughts that are there—thoughts of going, and doing, and wanting, thoughts inviting, thoughts exciting. And maybe even more importantly, notice the thoughts that aren’t there any more.
Now that you’ve built that future into sharp focus, notice what it will be like when you’ve already had it for a long time now. Put your lungs where those free-breathing lungs are, and take a breath along with them. Look around.
Is it okay to be okay? Is it safe to feel free?
Notice the parts of yourself that say, yes.
Notice the parts of yourself that say, no!
Perhaps they’re hidden. They’ve learned to hide from you, the parts of yourself that don’t want the things you want, that want the things you don’t want. What if we can make it safe for them to be a part of you, now? What if it’s safe for them to exist?
What if it’s safe for them to tell us why it hasn’t been okay to be okay? What if they finally get to tell us why it wasn’t safe to feel free?
What if we can treat the messengers of your hidden heart with the respect they’re due as faithful facets of you, and grant their messages a tender curiosity?
We can notice now that it’s possible to hold the past and the future together inside of you. To build a path from how things have been, to how they are already becoming. Nothing inside of you will ever be rejected or cast out—no, not even the parts of you that want to reject and cast out.
You’re allowed to move into your future as your whole self, every stick and sword of you. When we bow with respect to how and why you’ve gotten what you have, you get to have whatever you choose—all of you at once, on your own side about this at last.